Feel depressed

I feel very depressed, I just had my surgery a few days ago, and I am still recovering, with pain meds and some swelling. I feel my life has come to an end, not sure what to expect. I hope someone out here can write something inspiring, I sure could use something right now.

Edmond

19 Comments

Edmond

by relax221 - 2010-03-26 01:03:10

I've had a pacemaker put in 2000 and an ICD in 2007 and scheduled for replacement in June. What you're going thru will pass.I felt what you're going thru and it'd temporary. They will fine tune that baby and 3 months from now you wou'nt even know you have a pacemaker. Have a little faith and you'll be ok

MIke

keep smiling - and be positive

by breezy - 2010-03-26 01:03:26

Don't worry you will be fine - it all takes time to get adjusted - your body and your mind - you don't say why you have a PM - but if you didn't have it you might be worse off and not be alive at all - I have had mine for 5 months and my arm is still numb-but will get better in time - I had some pain where the PM was installed - that gets better too - so don't worry - just take one day at a time and you will see how much better you will be feeling - write down the things that are bothering you call the Dr or take it with you when you get your 3 month check up:) Be patient and think positive - go outside and breath the fresh air - thank GOD for your blessings and just know that it will all work out for you :) Take care
breezy

We have been there...

by qwerty - 2010-03-26 01:03:31

Most of us on this board have been where you are. I got my PM 2 months ago and I can tell you, it really does get better. The shoulder pain, the incision pain, those can be handled with the meds. Take them if you need them and sit back and heal a while. These pains will go away. The mental part of running on batteries, that too will take some getting used to. Give yourself time to heal. Life will go on and it is up to each of us to make each day what it is. Every experience can make us bitter or better. Sometimes we have to whine a bit and this is the place to do that. However, just know that things do get better and you have found people who are a great support group. Keep posting and let us know how you are and in a couple of weeks, YOU can post and let another newbie know.... It does get better.
Cherell

Depression

by Juan - 2010-03-26 01:03:32

Some depression following any surgery is not uncommon. I think it is caused by several things such as suddenly finding that you are prohibited from doing what you consider normal things and boredom sets in. Another thing is some medications, especially meds for pain, cause depression. I say if the depression is really bad, it is time to talk to your doctor.,

One year later..doing great!

by rozybud - 2010-03-26 01:03:46

I think everyone goes through that at first. I didn't know anyone my age 40 yrs old that has one so I was a mess at first. Feeling down etc.
It really helped to join this website, be thankful the stupid dr's finally found out what was wrong with me after 2 years and wake up each day and thank the Lord for another day. Started exercising and almost forget I have one...except while still trying to sleep on stomach. I promise it will get better. It's very normal to feel this way and it will pass.
Good luck!

getting new one today

by cjinto - 2010-03-26 01:03:52

Dont worry today at 3pm i am getting a new one(icd), after having old one of a few years taken out because of faulty machine and recalled leads. You will be fine and try to talk to everyone about this because nthe more people you talk to the better. Coming here is a good start. Good luck, Colleen

Edmond

by LS - 2010-03-26 01:03:54

It gets better every day!!!
Now that's not to say there aren't emotional ups & downs, but the mental & physical part do get better.
This board sure helps too!!
Visit daily for good ideas & compassion.
Hope you heal fast!
Hugs, Liz

Sir Edmond

by Dwight - 2010-03-26 02:03:49

Hang it there man. You have to stay strong! Many, many, many of us had those same feelings initially, myself included. At least you have pain meds, they told me not to take anything other than tylenol. It hurt like hell for a while but maybe they were right about the recovery process and less problems. Days will get better, stay busy, walk, (be really careful for a while), and keep informed through this site. I can't imagine what it would have been like without it for me. As time goes on you can assist others with what you are going through now. We are all pulling for you!
Be happy that you are more safe now than before the surgery. Good luck.
Dwight

It will get better!

by The Fish - 2010-03-26 03:03:02

Hello Edmond
I just had my PM put in 10 days ago and sympathize with what you are going through. I found this group the day I got home and it is the best! It is full of helpful caring people that can relate to almost anything or any feeling you are going through. My words of inspiration to you are, Each day gets a little better and you will change your outlook in a positive way too! You hang in there and know you have all of us cheering for you! Message anytime! Kind thoughts and positive thoughts I am sending to you.
Your one of many new friends
Howard

Thanks

by edmondme - 2010-03-26 04:03:23

Wow! Reading what everyone wrote, it's so refreshing! I am so happy that there are others (from Lost, the show on TV) that are like me. I will get on here everyday, I think being a part of you, is making me cry and giving me hope. I know as a guy I shouldn't cry, but I am glad to be a part of this group.

I fainted 2 months ago and felt dizzy spells, and the heart monitor found that I had skipped beats, so therefore this device!

Thanks to everyone, you are a great bunch!

Hi Edmond,

by Gellia2 - 2010-03-26 04:03:40

What all the others said. You are not alone. I'm glad you joined.
We're here and we understand.

My best to you,
Gellia

its true what theyve all said

by Hot Heart - 2010-03-26 04:03:51

I felt so depressed, and at 55 confused as to what the heck had happened to me that I needed a pm. I was fit, went to gym, danced, and felt about 20.............then wham pm put in.

I thought my life was over, thought i was now an old lady, worried all the time,scared and depressed

.....................That was 18 months ago!

Now, back to being a party animal! lol, its just a bit of metal that keeps us ticking over when our hearts decide to have a rest.

It will get better, go out enjoy your life,

HH x

roller coaster of emotions

by DanaT - 2010-03-26 07:03:27

I have been where you are too Edmond. I went through a roller coater of emotions. Feeling normal one day, and down in the dumps the next. Feeling pretty good one day and then feeling crappy the next. The good news is you WILL even out and feel better eventually. Today will be 4 weeks post pm for me. I feel almost back to normal again. Even my incision pain isn't constantly there anymore. This place was (is) a Godsend for me. Got me through a lot. There is always someone on here who knows what you're going through. Hang in there and keep us posted on your progress. :)

Dana

Hang in there....

by GMan - 2010-03-26 08:03:54

Edmond. Go back and read my original post...around August09 Looking for encouragement. Nothing you read on that post is true right now.

Remember yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery...TODAY A GIFT!

You will get past it...takes time!

Good luck!

Gary

I agree

by DawnLock - 2010-03-26 11:03:33

I had my PM inserted 11/19/09. I have had ups and downs both emotionally and physically. I am not quite right yet, and that is aggravating, BUT I do think some depression, especially with heart surgery, is very normal. Also, I get tired of people saying "well, it's no big deal, only pacemaker surgery." Maybe not for them, but it is for us who have to go thru it. So just hang in there, Edmond! We'll get thru it!

Hope you're feeling better soon!

Dawn

I promise it will get better

by heartu - 2010-03-26 12:03:24

Edmond,

I was where you are right now, a little over 4 weeks ago. What helped was finding and joining this forum, reading all the previous posts and, like you, finding the courage to submit my first post.

We all understand implicitly what you are going through and we are here to support in any way we can.

Even though we are all individuals and have our own unique experiences we do share that one common bond now.

To help me get through a lot of this was keeping a journal about what I was feeling physically, mentally, and emotionally. Now when I readback on my entries I see the great improvements I have made thus far.

Hugs to you and hang in there!!

you're normal.!!!

by Pookie - 2010-03-27 04:03:35

it's okay to be depressed, scared, worried, or anxious, as you just had a device implanted in your chest.

most of us have been thru what you are going thru. some of us had a harder time than others, but I promise you will get thru it.

unfortunately, it takes time.

you may want to seek counselling just to get your feelings out, you may just want to come here for encouragement or you may want to discuss it with your doctor as perhaps he/she might want to try you on some mild anti-depressants.

It's only my suggestion - but since you're only a few days into all of this, give it some time. I'm saying this because every medication has some kind of side effect and then you usually have to wean off of them.

I know it's hard and I cried every day for months and months I was SO scared.

All you can do is your best, and remember you are not alone, we are all here for you.

take care,
Pookie

edmond

by jessie - 2010-03-27 12:03:18

it will get better. when i first received mine i would burst into tears almost every 20 minutes. not now. i am dealing with a very sick husband and so i can't afford the luxury anymore. other priorties will evolve. trust me. it takes time it is a big deal tho so youare doing good . take care jessie up in canada on your border. yeh grew up in a border city love it!

Hang in there Edmond

by Linky - 2010-04-02 08:04:06

Guess what? By just admitting how hard it is all feeling for you right now is the best thing you can do. Let it all out, you are perfectly normal to be experiencing pain, discomfort, the why me? how will this affect the rest of my life & so on & so on. BUT think of it this way, you are a fortunate person - fortunate that you live in a country that has brilliant medical teams, a Dr that was able to ascertain what was wrong with you and how to fix it. Think of how many people are walking this planet right now that are ticking time bombs with dicky hearts & have no idea. I look at this way, every year when they do my download my Specialist is checking me out & is able to pick up minute details of things doing dicky with my heart that would not be picked up any other way except for tests, tests & more tests. Hang in there, it gets heaps better. Not only am I member of the Pacemaker Club I am a member of the Second chance club. My PM has given me back my health & gave me a life I never had before and now I can do heaps of things. Keep logging onto this site - there are heaps of inspirational people here & even though some people are really having hard times with their health they have lots of mates who understand on this site.
Cheers

You know you're wired when...

“Batteries not included” takes on a new meaning.

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I wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for pacemakers. I've had mine for 35+ years. I was fainting all of the time and had flat-lined also. I feel very blessed to live in this time of technology.