New guy checking in
Howdy,
I had my pacemaker implanted in August of last year. I'm still learning to live with it. My doc says that I won't need a replacement for atleast 6 years.
I have TGA but the reason why I needed a PM is because I developed heart block. In short it sucks I think: I came so close to dying, I mean really I did. I'm a single dad of two and after fighting for custody for over a year at that point I just think it was too much to be that close to the grave.
Normally I have a very positive outlook but lately I've been having increased soreness and lack of movement and fatigue from the PM's placement which has caused me to think about it more hence bringing my normally cheery self down.
I could use some advice on how everyone is dealing with it.
Thanks,
Jason
10 Comments
Welcome
by wenditt - 2010-06-02 09:06:49
Welcome to the club! You will find this site and it's members to be fantastic! They have all helped me ENORMOUSLY in the 8 1/2 months I've had my PM.
I have heart block too, but mine is intermittent so I don't use my PM that much. But it still doesn't make accepting the fact that it's there any easier.
You may find it's all a work in progress. Your body and your mind. You fought for your kids.....tap into the same kind of fight and fight to not let the PM bother you. It is what it is. It is there to help, watch over you and is a backup. Some people here call them their guardian angels! Isn't that a nice way of looking at it?????
As for the soreness, I would think it would have gone away by now. Unless you favored that arm so much that your shoulder joint froze up. Try stretching it and using bands to lift your arm to a horizontal position-even with your shoulders to build the muscle back. That's what I had to do.
I'm glad you found us.....and hope you are smiling and getting a little cheer back!!!!
Good luck-
Wenditt
Don't I Wish....
by wenditt - 2010-06-02 10:06:29
I know it's not that simple....I am not exactly one to practice what I preach LOL..... but I try. It will take you time....just know that everyone here takes their own path. Some get up and dust themselves off pretty quickly, other (including myself) seem to take FOREVER to adjust. But everyone here tells me I will get there....and I've come pretty darn far compared to the head case I was before....so I know I will get there eventually!
I think the type of soreness you are describing may never go away. Just kind of par for the course. I get sore when the seat belt rubs on mine or if I lean over the crib to put the baby to sleep or if I sleep on that side too long like you. I am thin so mine sticks out and basically has it's own shadow!
I think the pain triggers depression or depressing moods because you get an instant flashback and just when you think you've forgotten about it.....it hurts and you are instantly reminded it's there. I think it's a mortality issue really. You have kids to care for and the last thing you want to do is think about leaving them after you've fought so hard to get them. I'm with you on that one! My daughter is 2 and I think if she wasn't "here" I would have "gotten over it" already.
But you (and me) need to think about today....and do our best to show these children what living is like and how wonderful it can be. The true reality is that we only have today...and right now. Tomorrow isn't a guarantee for us or anyone else...PM or not! In fact....we are little more lucky than the rest! We have a built in EMT service!!!!
Try reading "The Shack." It gave me a whole new perspective!!!!
Welcome 84bobber
by Nevada Silver - 2010-06-03 02:06:11
There is not too much I can add that hasn't already been mentioned here. I had the 1st PM insertion for Atrial-Fib in 2001, followed by an ICD in 2006. That was a very critical time for me...I wonder often why I was spared? Still haven't figured it out? But, I'm trying. :-)
The darn thing still hurts! :-). Yes, it can bring you down...We all have up's and down's. When you feel you want to talk about it...we are all here, each with a story to share. I will say that your still here for a purpose and that would be your children. What a special Dad you must be !
I know this is a condition that you don't talk much about to your friends/family, because you know they really don't understand when this hasn't happened to them..Personally, I don't think I'm the mellow person I use to be...it can cause stress, that's a normal response. Keep busy. Do some fun things with your children and keep sharing your feelings with all of us...why? because we care!
Group hug!
Nevada Silver
Shifting pacer
by ElectricFrank - 2010-06-03 02:06:38
If the soreness keeps up check it out with the doc. According to the pacemaker implant instructions from Medtronic they are supposed to suture the pacer down to underlying tissue to keep it in place. For some reason docs will fail to do this and the result is a traveling pacer.
I also have AV Block. This is the simplest of the cardiac conduction problems. Your natural pacer is still pacing the atrium based on your activity and all the pacer needs to do is sense the atrial contraction and use it to time the ventricles. As long as they program it correctly your heart action should be near normal. I'm 80 yrs and still camp, hike, and explore with my Jeep. I spent time at 13,000' in the Colorado Rockies a couple of years ago. I've had the pacer over 5 years now.
By the way I see in your profile you live in Prescott Valley. I left there in 1999.
best,
frank
Welcome...
by qwerty - 2010-06-03 09:06:31
This is a great group. Can't add too much to what has been said. I got my PM 1/25 and all the physical stuff was just something I had to deal with, but I wasn't prepared for the emotional downers. They are a little harder. But this is a great board and Wenditt hit the nail on the head. You have to know that all the only guarntees are right now and you have to live now first. This board has shown me that this can just be part of the process and it too shall pass. You got two kids to nurture, teach and love. Go hug your kids and play a game, this time with them will go by so fast. I think most of us here have been through this, except maybe Electric Frank and he is just too cool to be depressed! When I grow up and get to 80, I expect Electric Frank to take me hiking! By then, he will only be 100 and will probably still be able to run circles around me.
Keep smiling it really is contagious.....
welcome to a great club
by rvrs7081 - 2010-06-05 04:06:07
Let me join in the group hug. Congratulations on getting your children. that must have been a fight and a half. Everyone here are such a help. We do care. We've been there. We know we are blessed with life, but that old depression will hit and heaven only knows why. After almost two years, the pain is pretty much a distant memory. The depression is better. Fears come and go.
Keep tuning in. I am sure your experiences will help someone else as some help you. Best wishes with the children. they grow so fast.
Ann
welcome
by ShadowWeaver - 2010-06-05 08:06:58
As most all have said, this is a great club and a great group of people...Welcome to our ranks. :) Like you, I was VERY depressed when I got my pacer in 03/09. While I didn't experiance much pain, I did experiance a LOT of depression and many on this board can attest. Don't ever feel like you are alone. In this club, we have all been there, and we all know what it is like. The depression is normal, but trust me when I say it will pass (at least for the most part). Spend some time enjoying the things that you would have missed without the pacemaker. I know that helped me a lot. Keep in mind that everyone here knows what you are going through as we have all been there. Feel free to share your emotions with us, it helps and I assure you that you will always get an understanding answer.
Thanks for all the encouragement
by 84bobber - 2010-06-07 03:06:22
Thank you for all the help and kind words. Sorry I haven't logged on in awhile; I've been busy with the kids and everything else. The way I've found to deal with depression is to go on a long ride, normally it works really well. Thanks again and I'll be checking back in later tonight, so have a good day everyone.
Jason
Well more bad news
by 84bobber - 2010-06-08 04:06:25
I went down to Phoenix yesterday so my daughter could see her ophthalmologist and came home around 9 pm. At 9:15 I suddenly had immense chest pain that also went to the area of the incision. I toughed it out and got the kids to bed then my mom watched the kids while I went off to the E.R. with my girlfriend.
I was getting x-rays, CT scans, blood tests, urine tests etc. At first they thought I had a blood clot then I was discharged just after midnight with "Atypical Angina" luckily I see my regular PCP tomorrow and Monday I have to travel back to Phoenix to see my Cardiologist.
Jason
You know you're wired when...
The meaning of personal computer is taken a step further.
Member Quotes
In fact after the final "tweaks" of my pacemaker programming at the one year check up it is working so well that I forget I have it.
Glad to have found the site
by 84bobber - 2010-06-02 09:06:20
Thanks,
That's a good way to look at it but I've never taken it that lightly. I wish I could though. The soreness is occasional or if I slept on my side wrong or something like that. The pocket shifted to the left about 3 months ago which can give me intermittent pain in my arm pit area.
Originally I was told I would need one by the time I was 18, the only bad part about that is that I was diagnosed at 5. I have about 90% range of motion back now, I didn't favor it too bad and I now am going back to the gym. So I'm almost back to my old self but I get random waves of pain which trigger depression. Which really sucks for me.
I'm glad I found this site, seems like a great group of folks.
Jason