shoulder pain

i am 3 years with my icd i have pulled wires been shocked had phantom shocks had the thing repaired gained weight lost weight delt with metal detectors 440 3 phase motors i have tried living that normal life but i hate to say it folks but the device just buggs the crap out of me over time my left side my arm and shoulder hurts it gets worse at times dealing with unemployment disability shocks numbness doctor visits been told it will get better hey let me rant ok it is great to be alive but it is not pain free going from being a very active man to being passive knowing i could always take care of myself and others but a hint of weakness to be helpless at times kills me hey its fathers day and i hurt i saw a new md before he could glance at my med record he said i can go and have an mri done on my shoulder ha ha ok you new guys annd old farts it comes down to living or dying if you are in pain well i am still here with my icd if i did not have it i would not be here to whine ok everybody just hang in there life only gets better...love murf


4 Comments

Happy Fathers Day Murf

by gldoble - 2008-06-15 03:06:21

Good morning Murf,

I've had mine for a year now and aside from the usual pains and extra cautions, I've figured out how to get around most the BS. My biggest problem is that if I were to take the disability, excetra, I'd friggen starve to death along with my kids. A few weeks ago I had a comopete melt down, and from what I gather here and from others that they were surprised it took a year. But I'm back to being somewhat normal, what ever that is.

I have found that if I continue to live as I did before this damed thing, that I can keep some senblance of sanity. I go to work, even though the docs are always saying, stop rest, yad yada yada. Well I can't exactly do that, so if this tinker toy breaks while I'm overseas or something worse happens so be it. I'm alive, I'm doing what I want to, except working, but then if I didn't I'd go frig'n nuts for real. And I'm having fun. I found that the little blue actually does work and if I use the way the Doc says its a "Really Good Thing", but aside from that I figure if I wake up in the morning even after being up until the wee hours of the mornings on some weekends thats its ok. And if you want to rant, please my friend go right ahead. Cause no one has more of a right than us to rank and rave.

So enjoy your rant, enjoy the daily BS of being here,
cause like you said you wouldn't be here. And becuase of all of us and what we have been given, we still can give a extra kick in the pants to the world no matter how small of a kick.

Hang tuff Murf, it only gets better because we are here.

Greg

Delayed response

by harley63 - 2008-06-16 08:06:17

Hey Murf & Greg!

Ya'll are SO right!! I too had a delayed response to getting my pacemaker. Initially I went full force back into life. Almost running around in a scurry to do the things that I had not done. Perhaps in fear that I'd not have another chance to do them. 10 months post implantation.. I hit the brick wall.. and boom, life came to a complete hault! Everything was at a stand still, work, play and pretty much basic living. One day while sitting here in the middle of a big pitty party.. I figured that hey, I'm upright, I'm breathing, I'm awake.. so what am I whinning about?? I started looking at "the situation" from another person's view point and set out to see all the MD's.. with my list and my speech about "it's my life and the quality is rapidly declining!" Changed a few MD's, have others that will be seen on a limited basis and found this site! Though much information, support and encouragement from the folks here.. I have tackled the pacemaker issues, medications, quality of life concerns and many personal battles in the past 6 months. This coming Dec. I will celebrate 2 yrs of assistance from my "internal bling bling" and look forward to many more years!

Murf, hang tough and empower your self with information regarding what will suit your lifestyle for the best quality of life! We are all here cheering for you and everyone!

Harley63

Shoulder pain

by joy1 - 2008-06-17 09:06:23

Hi Murf,

Hope your Father's Day was a good one inspite of your shoulder pain. I have had my ICD for 2 1/2 years. My reaction to my implant was immediate though I fought the anxiety and depression but over the course of the following 6 months I began to accept having my ICD, allergies and all, till it miss fired. After that I was done trying to accept any part of it. I have had shoulder pain the entire time. Frozen shoulder to be specific. I have had several rounds of PT and Cortizone injections but the problem is bad enough that the doctors have concluded the only possible way to resolve my problem is to put me under and break the adhesions. No can do as long as the wires are in. Subsequently, I have also developed problems with my right shoulder as well because of compensating. I live on a supply of Percocet and benedryl cream on top of all the other meds I take. Yes, the tingling, numbness, poor coordination and balance problems are all issues. I have lost track of the number of falls I have taken. I still will reach to catch myself with my left hand. Did I say that I was left handed?

Personally, I think we have a right to complain about the decrease in our quality of life. Yes, I read the stories about kids going thru this and my heart goes out to them and their parents but just because we're adults doesn't mean our problems are any less or more than theirs. I am greatful to be alive but hate being dependant on others. I can't do a fraction of the things I used to do. If I did not have a a family I try to take care of I might be able to take care of myself 24/7 but even that is questionable. Yes, I'm glad to be alive. I remind myself of that alot. This site has helped me process some of my anger and unhappiness. I have been told by my attorney I qualify for SSD in all areas but they will have to fight the issues of my age (i'm under 50) and my higher education. Like you and Greg and harley, I wish I could say that my device has helped better my life but in my case, it didn't. It deffinatly improved someone's life though, the bill totalled over 240K. Wish I had that then life wouldn't be so bad at all.

Joy

Everything happens for a reason?

by fireryan - 2008-07-01 08:07:26

Well I see that the optimism here is lacking. Come on people "its not that bad." or "it could be worse."
Well these are some of the poor coping skills others have for Device Dependent Patients. I'm sure you've heard them all. Well most of the people that tell you these things are not in your shoes. It simply is a horrible thing that has happened to "us." The alternative is much worse which is grossly obvious, but that doesn't take the lifestyle changes away. Me, I'm a 30 y/o Lieutenant Firefighter that was the poster of health....dropped dead on my birthday and walah
Desk Job. I am give praise to God for my second chance. I am truly blessed to be here. I am blessed to have a job still.
The flip side....I miss my truck (fire truck) the guys at the station, diving, exercising....the freedom from a device malfunctioning or "welding" me again, ripping the leads from a physical activity........
These things come in my mind everyday. I can only pray that God can help me understand his plan.
The device has its pros and cons. You can harp on the cons as much as you want. People harp on gas prices everyday, but you don't hear "Hey it beats walking."

You know you're wired when...

You have a shocking personality.

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