Getting married

Marriage Material?

by Gotrhythm - 2018-08-09 11:32:14

People with pacemakers can and do get married, get pregnant, have healthy children, and live long and productive lives. Statisticallly, they live as long as people without pacemakers.

There's a difference between the kind of heart condition that can be treated with a pacemaker, i.e. electrical problems, and actual heart disease. Many people with pacemaker have perfectly healthy hearts. There is nothing about having a pacemaker that would disqualify a person, male or female, from entering into a marriage.

All things considered when choosing a mate, there are far more important qualifications than presence or absence of a pacemaker.

If you encounter someone who thinks you're not good enough to marry becuase you have a pacemaker, be glad you found out what they are like before you make a commitment. They are not good enough for you!

Thanks Robin1 and Gotrhythm

by GS - 2018-08-09 13:21:24

Yes, I know it may be an issue here. But when I was googling, I found many such cases n experiences in America Britain or European countries. So, just tried to ask here. 

Hi Ronib1

by GS - 2018-08-10 00:26:54

Sorry, just wanted to ask if having a pacemaker n getting married is a difficult proportion (not by activity level but by people's thought) as I did figure it online in reports from across the world. I thought people here could help me. Thanks for your response. 

My response

by AgentX86 - 2018-08-10 12:34:59

Getting married is a difficult proposition (so difficult that I only managed it once, 47 years ago). I don't see that a pacemaker has anything to do with it though. As long as no one is hiding anything, what's the big deal?

Marriage

by Selwyn - 2018-08-10 12:39:25

It is good to understand that having a pacemaker does not affect your life expectancy. 

You can have a normal pregnancies with a pacemaker in place.

To discuss any mutual  health issues prior to marriage is a good idea.  Discussion of what you would like out of a life together, your aspirations, your future,  is constructive. Mutual interests are always useful, as is the ability of families to get on.  It is bad to have 'secrets'. Marry for love- wrinkles and all. 

You should not drift into marriage or be compelled to marry. Cohabiting in general is thought to increase the risk of relationship breakdown, though after 7 years of marriage this effect is no more. 

My worst case experiences:  a bride beaten black and blue on her wedding day by her new husband ( I saw her beaten, still in her wedding dress). A friend married a woman only to find within a week she was schizophenic and having a relapse! I saw the same man 30 years later, he had spent his life being single and never re-married after his divorce. 

We are about to start our 39th year together. Like good wine, a marriage matures on keeping! It is the more enjoyable for the keeping. 

Kind regards,

Selwyn 

man's opinion

by The real Patch - 2018-08-10 13:09:25

share the fact you are getting/have a pacemaker before the wedding. If he/she backs out of the wedding, give thanks and enjoy the reception without them. Doesn't matter your beliefs or religion, if someone gets angry and upset about something like that run away fast.

Be aware there will probably be questions, be prepared to answer openly and honestly.

Taking another go at an answer

by Gotrhythm - 2018-08-10 13:58:40

Okay, I think you are asking, among preople seeking marriage, is there prejudice against people with pacemakers?

I don't know. Occasionally, people with pacemakers have trouble getting or keeping jobs in the military and police departments, because there is the unfounded fear that they will be unable to do their jobs.

But marriage? I doubt if people with pacemakers have any harderr time finding a mate than anyone elsem but there arent enough people in the marriage seeking age group to be able to make generalizations.

I doubt if the answer to your question exists.

Is someone tellling you that no one will want you if you have a pacemaker? They are wrong.

to be honest...

by The real Patch - 2018-08-10 17:13:00

To be absolutely honest, I certainly wouldn't want to marry Gotrhythm, but that has nothing to do with her pacemaker. My wife would frown on it

Values and Beliefs

by AgentX86 - 2018-08-10 23:55:36

While what you say is true, if she wanted to know what the stigma of an illness was in her society, I'd think she'd be asking someone in her society.  However, she was asking how a pacemaker could affect her marriage, in a pacemaker support group.  The assumption is that she was asking for more technical information.  Note that several, here, asked her to clarify her question. Since there is no health reason a pacemaker would interfere with a marriage (the underlying disease might but not the pacemaker), my only answer was to be truthful.  Secrets don't go over well in a marriage and a pacemaker isn't one that can be hidden long.

It's not that the question wasn't welcome (it is on-topic, as far as I can tell) but it is rather vague. If the issue were honor killings, it would have been off-topic in this forum (and I presume, not welcome).

Thanks everyone

by GS - 2018-08-11 23:44:36

Thanks for your answers. The question was based on my Google experiences when I looked for it and just wanted to have an opinion. There were more of bad experiences even if other people talked positively about it. 

I've had women run....

by BOBTHOM - 2018-08-13 22:59:00

As a single male I can tell you there are quite a number of people who will run from the idea of getting involved with someone that has a major medical condtion.  Or maybe I'm just an @$$.

Either way, happily living single and still enjoying the hunt!