How far to you follow your faith?

I'm 27yrs old and was born with a Congenital Heart Block. I hear this is normal because my mom has Lupus. I had my pacemaker put in 12yrs ago this week and it's almost time to have it replaced.
I've always felt as if putting a mechanical device in your body to keep you alive was not what we should be doing. I don't think God intended us to be bionic half machine/ half human. I don't mean to affend anyone, it's just the way I feel.
I'm not very religious but I do believe that somewhere within all of us is our soul, which is probably in our heart. Our main source of life.
I think part of my beliefs stem from my mother having Lupus. She has always been on tons of medication and at the first sign of any problem in my adolescence I was taken to be diagnosed with ADD and Depression. We all have our faults, we all get mad, sad, happy, hyper and lazy. I was put on Lexapro and Aderrall, and I still take them to this very day. When I grew up, I noticed that these medications had taken away my individuality ever since I started taking them. I may have done better in school but at what cost.
Medications are one thing, but to put a battery in my heart to make it beat. What right to I have to fiddle with God’s creation? Everyone says “I have to get it replaced, I don’t have a choice!” The elephant in the corner with these discussions is always death. No one wants to say it, no one wants to think it.
Is there anyone who sees my side of this?

13 Comments

God and my heart and my existence

by Hot Heart - 2009-03-17 03:03:26

I believe that if God did not want to let us be fitted with a pacemaker He would not have allowed it to have been invented.

Also, on the suicide bit, something did occur to me recently. I believe in euthanasia for myself in the event of me getting alzheimers or having a stroke and being unable to communicate. I wonder if I could make a living will to say that if I am unable to authorise my change of battery in the future, and it is thought that I will never again be able to authorise it, if I could request it is not done, and therefore I would fade away over a period of time as I'm 100% dependent.

Good question

by renee14150 - 2009-03-17 03:03:40

Wow...it certainly made me think....and as I was thinking i came up with this.
What right do I have to not choose to continue living and therefore take myself away from all the people that love and care for me. Would not getting it replaced be a form of suicide????/
Renee

Good question

by renee14150 - 2009-03-17 03:03:40

Wow...it certainly made me think....and as I was thinking i came up with this.
What right do I have to not choose to continue living and therefore take myself away from all the people that love and care for me. Would not getting it replaced be a form of suicide????/
Renee

Living With Or Without Your PM

by SMITTY - 2009-03-17 04:03:17

Hello Mrestis,

I don't know how much good advice you have gotten (I haven't read the other omments yet) but as you can see you have broached a subject that has gottenlots of comments.

Your qestion, "Is there anyone who sees my side of this?" Yes, I see your side of it, but what I see may not be the same thing that you see written on your side. So I'll leave it there. I do want to say neither am I very religious, but that doesn't keep me from being aware of something I heard when I was young. "God helps those that help themselves." Now with that said I'll try for a little more.

Let's start with your pacemaker being 12 years old and still working. To me that says your pacemaker has not been a factor in keeping you alive very often. Those few times it did help could very well be the reason you are still with us. Or, it is entirely possible that it has never done anything other than monitor your heart function just waiting for the time to help and that time has never come, or been extremely rare for the battery to last 12 years. However, those times it did help, if there are such times, are probably stored in the memory of that PM and retrieved at each checkup. So ask your doctor just how often that PM helps your heart keep beating.

As for your statement "I've always felt as if putting a mechanical device in your body to keep you alive was not what we should be doing." For starters that is not a mechanical device, it is an electronic device. Yes I'm aware I'm nitpicking there.

But do you think that people that have knee or hip replacements should not have that surgery. While in the majority of the cases those devices do not keep the person alive as does a PM, but in some cases it can be the difference between life and death. Or how about that medicines you are taking? Do you think they may be keeping you alive? They could very well be keeping you from self-destruction in a roundabout way so they too are keeping you alive.

As for using a battery to keep your heart beating being an affront to God, I don't think so. In my opinion the heart is no bigger player in keeping me alive than is my brain, stomach, intestines, etc. True if the heart stops beating death may come quicker than if some of the other organs of our body were to quit working, but we face death just as certainly without the other organs.

As for death being a certainty without your PM, I doubt that is true. You may not feel as well as you do now and you may die sooner, but based on the length of time your present one has lasted, as I said earlier, I doubt that it has been much more than a life boat. A lifeboat still waiting to be used. But talk to your doctor, He can tell you how often that life boat has saved your life.

One more thing. You were very young when you got a PM. I can see how you would have thought that PM was keeping your heart beating every minute of every day. Rarely does a PM work that way. I grant you some people are 100% PM dependant, but very few of them would die immediately if the PM were to stop working. You see the heart has some built self preservation systems that will come into play as a last resort when our heart rate starts to slow down tomuch and there are not other problems with the heart. For the majority of us out PM is an on demand device, something that we carry around in our body to help us out when needed. When not needed our PM just sits there watching what our heart is doing ready to help when needed.

Now back to my first line. I think you are feeling bad and indulging in a little self pity and taking it out on that man made object in your body that you think is keeping you alive. Are you old enough to remember the Old Philosopher? At this point he would break into a little tune and ask "is that what's bugging your friend" and proceed to sing something to cheer you up. Well I'm not the Old Philosopher and I can't sign a lick, but I say get out and run around the block a time or two and then see how the world looks to you.

I wish you the best,

Smitty

Faith

by scadnama - 2009-03-17 04:03:24

I don't believe that a pacemaker or any other medical intervention is interfering with God's plan. I believe that my pacemaker has given me a second chance, and because of that, I try and live each day to the fullest.

Amanda

nope

by Tracey_E - 2009-03-17 04:03:32

Sorry, but I don't see that side of it at all. There are religions that think modern science is sinful and modern medicine should be avoided, but I've never understood that point of view because Jesus was known as a healer. The ability to use our intelligence is a gift from God. If that gift is used to create something to make us live longer and better, I think God is all for it.

Gee........

by Pookie - 2009-03-17 08:03:43

I have struggled with believing in God (or not) most of my life. When I ran into this medical brick wall (my pacemaker & other heart issues) and a host of other medical ailments that quickly followed, I really started to question faith and religion and God big time. I still haven't come up with an answer ... for me.

I guess my question to you would be: if you were a diabetic, would taking insulin be the same as having a pacemaker? Both help an organ in your body function. A hearing aide is an electronic gadget...is it not? Or am I comparing apples to oranges???

I dunno. Perhaps because the organ we are talking about is our HEART we tend to think differently.

Only YOU can decide what is best for you.

Pookie

My 2¢ Worth

by pacergirl - 2009-03-17 10:03:02

I believe that is God wanted me dead..... Then it certainly would be so.

I have had so many brushes with death that I firmly believe that I have a Guardian Angel and She has been working overtime on many occasions!

I also hope she keeps up the good work! Plus, if you're reading this, dear guardian Angel.... Thank you! =)

Pacergirl

I see your side, but...

by furnhusch - 2009-03-17 10:03:22

What god would give us the ability to fabricate these wonderful devices and then not expect us to use them?

DARK AGES

by pete - 2009-03-18 03:03:36

Take away modern medicine and we will be back in the dark ages. And this site would not even exist. Most of us would have passed away. Give me life anyday, it maybe all I am going to get and I intend to make the most of it. Remember the saying "everybody wants to go to heaven but nobody wants to die" not 100% true but close to the mark. I cannot bear to think of the terrible suffering that would ensue from the lack of modern medical intervention particularly the expert pain control in the hospice where I work. Cheers Peter

i prayed for the first time in years

by bullseye - 2009-03-18 04:03:14

hi im not a relegius person nor do i go to church ,but over the last few months with hubby having a seven hour heart opp and on a vent in icu for over a week and having ct scans to see why he wasnt coming round or responding and over a week at his bedside beleve me i prayed and prayed ,even found comfort in the hospital chapel just the quiteness of it with my thoughts ,and yes he answerd my questions and heard my plees with the help of medical intervention hubby now home and on the mend .
as for following faith well as such a worrying time we all need someone or somthing to hang on to whatever that maybe and would just like to say thank you all on here for helping me as well bullseyex

I'm not very religious

by BillMFl - 2009-03-18 09:03:18

But I never criticize anybody's religious beliefs. Most religions support life in general as opposed to death. I'm not aware of any main stream religion that is in a hurry to find out if heaven exists or not. They all want to get there, but not prematurely. I don't think you will find any scripture that says one has to accept death if an alternative is available. Just think how many young people who don't have a choice are terminally ill with no treatment available. Bet they would trade places with you in a NY second.

Look at it this way

by ElectricFrank - 2009-03-19 01:03:28

I'm not going to try to talk you into or out of your religious beliefs. You have worked them out over time and hopefully they work well for you.

Now here are a couple of bits of information you may be able to integrate into them. First off all a pacemaker does is replace a defective electrical circuit in your heart. When it is working properly your heart beats very nearly normally and your body receives the blood flow it needs to function well. The pacemaker doesn't interfere with your thinking or decision making processes.

On the other hand the medications circulate in the blood stream and not only accomplish their intended purpose of affecting your heart rhythm, but also circulate in to your brain and and have side effects on mood, and thinking ability. They also have adverse effects on the other organs of your body.

I wish you the best,

frank

You know you're wired when...

Your signature looks like an EKG.

Member Quotes

Just because you have a device doesn't mean you are damaged goods and can't do anything worthwhile and have to lie down and die. In fact, you're better and stronger. You're bionic!